Things you learn as an apprentice or new guy

JeffKiper

Lifetime Supporting Member + Moderator
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Jun 2006
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I was on welding forum and guys where discussing why things are called what they are called. So I gave them my story of one of my apprentices.

"My apprentice 7 or 8 years ago called me a liar. I explained to him that he just used up his one and only I get to call the boss a name to his face. I continued to explain to him that next time I send him after paste on metal shrink he better go get it. I don't want that spray on stuff. He argued that there was no such thing a metal shrink paste. I grabbed a jar of never seize. I had him try to put the a 0.9995" pin in a 1.0000" hole it just wouldn't fit. Then I use the magic metal shrink paste and the pin went right in. His jaw almost hit the floor. I explained that it bonded with the base metal and allowed it to shrink 0.0001" per inch of circumference. So a 1.0000" inch pin would shrink 0.000314".

He still calls it metal shrink and the guys can't believe that I never set him straight.

Yea I know I shouldn't have been that way."

I am sure that there are a some good storied out there so lets have em.
 
I had him try to put the a 0.9995" pin in a 1.0000" hole

I guess you meant 1.0000" pin, in a 0.9995" hole. Good story by the way.
I can't say I have learned the hard way, I always listen to my elders and senior techs they know their stuff and have more experience. My story is more of a lesson learned as far as safety which I had already learned in the military, but got emphasized in the civilian world quick. So while I was all the way on the ceiling on the boom uninstalling all thread that held a conveyor in place, I looked down on my co-worker he was working on the same project, maneuvering the scissor lift into a narrow area, left hand placed on the rail (big no no), I couldn't tell his clearance from up there, but I soon found out it wasn't any, while he was going up his hand got caught up between the rail and the conveyor, he yelled so loud, and his hand was about the size of a grapefruit, ever since I don't care how much clearance I got my hands never touch the rail. :ROFLMAO:
 
Boy I can just imagine the stories that will come rolling in with this thread. My story goes like this: Back in the day I went in to millitary right out of high school. Took up the electrical trade and learned quite a bit about electricity and life. So a couple of weeks into my training one of the elders, can't remember if it was a civilian I worked with or other millitary, sent me to supply to procure the light bulb filiment repair kit. Well the peopple at supply all know this little game from previous noobs so they proceed to send me on the old wild goose chase. Spent quite a bit of time looking for that repair kit before someone clued me in. I like to use that one on new people just to see what kind of reaction I get. Looking back I still laugh about that.
 
Whoosh... That was the sound of the humor flying over your head.

It wasn't suppose to be funny, I was just pointing out a typo to the OP. Instead of finding humor where it doesn't exist tell us you story, I am sure you have plenty of humorous stories.
 
I guess you meant 1.0000" pin, in a 0.9995" hole. Good story by the way.

I didn't mis-type this the pin is 0.0005" smaller than the hole. A tight fit in the lab and a tighter fit in the shop floor with dirt and grease.
 
Way back I worked in a cable mill that manufactured coax of all sizes. My first assignment,like every new guy was basically a gofer. Roll reels of cable around, prep the ends for test equipment leads, etc. One day one of the testers says to me, "This reel is 10 feet too short, go tell the foreman you need the basement keys to go down cellar and get the cable stretcher." Of course there was no such tool, and this building was on a slab to boot. The foreman just shook his head and told me to get back to work.
 
When the apprentice isn't looking you shake the level until the bubble separates into two bubbles. Show him the broken level then send him back to the shop to get the extra level bubbles. Whoever he asks always sends him on a wild goose chase.
 
Before I got into this trade, better than a decade ago, I selected groceries for a large wholesale grocier. We trained in groups of 5 with one or two trainers per group. I saw people sent to pick cases of chicken beaks, crab necks, chicken feet, pallet stretcher, etc....funny guys.

-Dave
 
Traditionally in England, anyone young gets sent to the stores for a "Long Weight" or a "long stand". Unfortunately when we tried this some years ago the storeman snached the requisition out of the trainees hand and without even reading it said "Thats not a proper part number" and sent him away!

The other initiation ceremony was to go over to the pub on a Friday and get the apprentice drunk. For anyone on this site whos been stationed in my neck of the woods (Bases at Mildenhall and Lakenheath)four pints of Draught Abbot ale can have a really debillatating effect on a 16 year old!!!
 
Last edited:
Hi all

In ireland you can get sent for a bucket of steam or
Some sky hooks. I once sent a guy for 40 welding shields as
There were cows there and I said I did not want to blind them.he had to walk about 2 miles across
Fields with wet grass, this was so funny from my side til he came back
And told me the plant Engineer was in the store and I paid for it
For the next couple of weeks. Just to add the guy was the plant Engineers
Son, he did not see the funny side of it til years later and he told
Me it was the best joke on a new guy he heard in 20 years
This was 4 years after i has left

Donnchadh
 
Last edited:
Hey Donnchadach
I'll be in Ireland in a few weeks touring and visiting.
Tell me which pub to show up at with a bucket of steam and we'll hoist a few.
You can send a private message
 

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