What's the funniest joke you've ever heard about your industry or type of business?

I have had exactly that discussion with a client shortly before Christmas indeed. Client was 100% sure that it was a software issue. The cause of the problem turned out to be mechanical, as I had stated from the get go. Similar thing has happened to me several times before. It would be funny if it wasn't so sad.

I can deal with someone that doesn't know electricity or logic to point the finger...

What really ****es me off is when an electronic technician pulls me out of bed because "The solenoid wouldn't activate, but the PLC is sending a command to it".
The fuse holder had the little LED light showing the fuse was broken... but I guess once he said "We didn't check the panel", I was a fool for thinking the problem was anything else.
 
I remember at the trade show where Allen-Bradley first introduced Rocksoft (before they renamed it to Rockwell Software) the joke at the show was:


'Pull down your Wonderware and get your Rocksoft'


They changed it to Rockwell Software in less then two days after that.
I still have some swag that has Rocksoft on it.
 
My RESPONSE to the funniest thing I heard was:

"You want it by WHEN?"

I couldn't stop laughing....

Yup. A couple more good ones:
-manager says "we will give you plenty of advance notice before you're scheduled to go on site"
-"you will only have to be on site for a day"
 
Yup. A couple more good ones:
-manager says "we will give you plenty of advance notice before you're scheduled to go on site"
-"you will only have to be on site for a day"

I was on the system's integrator and client side of this conversation with pretty much the same companies (moved from supplier to client) and just would simply refuse to address only the manager when it came to schedule a service visit trip.

If the manager didn't include the engineer visiting so I could send a complete scope (not his direct manager), then I would just contact the person above him...

Mostly because the guy knew exactly what he was up for and could prepare beforehand reducing the time required on site, I wouldn't have to be waiting and losing opportunities because he had to download stuff, but more importantly I only had to deal with the frustration caused by my delays and not with the fact that the guy got roped into weeks of work thinking it was a walk in the park.
 
After the foreman had been killed by the machine by ingeniously defeating the safety systems. (he climbed over the safety fence)
The next foreman told me he needed a cheat key to open the gates without stopping the machine.
 
After the foreman had been killed by the machine by ingeniously defeating the safety systems. (he climbed over the safety fence)
The next foreman told me he needed a cheat key to open the gates without stopping the machine.


I was at a stamping plant and the maintenance supervisor wanted me to bypass the light curtains on 12 presses in Manual, Setup and Single Stroke modes - to only work in automatic mode.


That was an easy answer to think up - NO!



Plus, he was only at that plant for about 3 months, earning the nickname "55 Gallon Drum Of Oil" by the plant manager there.
 
I had a manger once ask me to see if I could program the PLC to issue a warning right before something mechanical was about to break.

I said sure thing, I will just insert a few "crystal ball" instructions in the ladder logic. He looked at me with a straight face and said "really, they call it a crystal ball instruction?".
 
I had a manger once ask me to see if I could program the PLC to issue a warning right before something mechanical was about to break.

I said sure thing, I will just insert a few "crystal ball" instructions in the ladder logic. He looked at me with a straight face and said "really, they call it a crystal ball instruction?".

Actually that is starting to get some attention...

It is now called "Predictive Maintenance Logic".
 
Actually that is starting to get some attention...

It is now called "Predictive Maintenance Logic".

Unfortunately it requires the mechanical engineer to have some idea of failure modes, and able to give the programmer enough information to model this accurately.

Sometimes the additional information required to predict failures requires additional sensors. Often only worth it on large machines, e.g. vibration sensors

And the final nail in the coffin is that majority of operators will ignore anything on the screen telling them to do more work. Unless the control system can automatically feed info into a CMMS, or there is a regular inspection task for maintenance to check for these prompts, they will go unheeded.

In saying that, providing good info on run hours, counters, max torque etc etc is definitely worth doing, for those companies that implement a proper preventative maintenance program.
 

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