What's the funniest joke you've ever heard about your industry or type of business?

According to most customers it is always the program. The damaged wiring, missing sensors, and broken mechanical parts are never the problem.
Well, it is. It's always the program. "Can't you program around that? Why didn't someone think about this fault happening at some point and program a workaround already then? Why did the power plant stop becaus of a broken instrument??"

The joke of my life, work wise, I guess..
 
An optimist sees a glass that is half full.
A pessimist sees a glass that is half empty.
An engineer sees a glass that is twice as big as it needs to be.
 
A PLC programmer walks into a bar.

There's a Network Guy, a Scale Guy, and a Telephone Guy there.

The PLC guy doesn't know which one to punch in the nose first.
 
According to most customers it is always the program. The damaged wiring, missing sensors, and broken mechanical parts are never the problem.


Production Mentality Troubleshooting 101:
1. Machine won't work.
2. Call the electrical guy.
3. Production mgr. asks why it's taking so long to find problem.
4. Let them determine why the machine won't continue.
5. Electrical guy calls for the proper trade to fix the problem (fitter, millwright, machine repairman, etc.)
 
Biggest joke I've heard is that if a machine is running fine for years and it breaks down, the program must have changed


I have had exactly that discussion with a client shortly before Christmas indeed. Client was 100% sure that it was a software issue. The cause of the problem turned out to be mechanical, as I had stated from the get go. Similar thing has happened to me several times before. It would be funny if it wasn't so sad.
 
https://xkcd.com/74/

A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts:

Excuse me, can you help me? I promised my friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."

The man below says: "Yes. You are in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above this field. You are between 40 and 42 degrees N. latitude, and between 58 and 60 degrees W. longitude."

"You must be an engineer" says the balloonist.

"I am" replies the man. "How did you know?"

"Well" says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I am still lost."

The man below says "You must be a manager."

"I am" replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well", says the engineer, "you don't know where you are, or where you are going. You have made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it is somehow my fault."
 
Wait by the bathroom and ambush the Radio Guy. You're going to get blamed for his problems anyway.

The Radio Guys problems are often caused by the PLC guy trying to poll 100 remote sites at 5 second intervals over a 2400 baud serial radio, then wondering why it doesn't work.

That's why I like being both the radio guy and the PLC guy. If it doesn't work, there's only one ***hole to blame.
 
There are 10 types of people in this world:

Those that know binary
Those that don't
 

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