OT: What this world needs

[paulcs]

When they call looking for "Mary Smith", I take a moment and politely explain that Mary has died.

 

[geniusintraining]

How about a air horn, just blast their ears off... you know that they have a head set on and it will take several seconds for them to take it off

 

[cntrlfrk]

My wife shakes her head when sometimes I will take a polling call or questionaire, mainly out of pity since when I was in college I took a 'pay-nothing' job running a phone and doing something similar.

However, I usually get bored to death about half way through and start answering the same "C" or "2" to every question, then to pick up the pace and get things over with, start giving my answer before the caller had finished asking the question or maybe barely begun. They obviously get annoyed, but it usually stops the calls for awhile.

Also why I don't put a whole lot of stock in polls. Who actually answers these, let alone seriously?

I made the mistake of letting my kids fill out some form for a contest to win an ATV at the mall a few years back. The phone started ringing non-stop about 4 days later. Now I make sure my phone number (or address either) doesn't get put on anything that could fall into the hands of the evil people that could come between me and my enjoying a nice juicy steak for supper.

 

[Jimmie_Ohio]

Here's my thoughts on this topic:

1) I rarely physically answer my landline. I screen calls using the answering machine. Likewise, on my cell phone, I let unrecognized numbers that come up on my caller ID go to voicemail. If it is indeed legitimate,nothing is so important that I can't get back in a minute or two.

2) If for some strange reason I do pick up, I IMMEDIATELY and politely state that I'm not interested, then hang up before they get a word in edgewise.

3) In my earlier naive days, I learned some tricks. One is if it is a call about a product, tell them you I just bought one. Two, if it is a service, I tell them that my brother is in that business. (Who thinks they can pry business away from a close family member?)

Finally, I have a question for the "modem gurus" on this site. Frequently, you may get a call from an automated calling machine "feeling out" your number as a voice line. The answering machine will answer, but the caller will hang up with no evidence of it being a human. I always wondered if you could answer, press the # key (octothorpe for you trivia nuts) tricking the calling mechanism into thinking it called a data line. This would not allow your number to get transfered to the "have a human call this number" list.

Am I right about this? Would this work?

 

[Eric Nelson]

Here's my thoughts on this topic:
Finally, I have a question for the "modem gurus" on this site. Frequently, you may get a call from an automated calling machine "feeling out" your number as a voice line. The answering machine will answer, but the caller will hang up with no evidence of it being a human. I always wondered if you could answer, press the # key (octothorpe for you trivia nuts) tricking the calling mechanism into thinking it called a data line. This would not allow your number to get transfered to the "have a human call this number" list.

Am I right about this? Would this work?

You need a 914 Hz tone (LINK)



-Eric

 

[dmroeder]

Ha Ha Ha, this is a personal favorite technique of mine (my record so far is 27 minutes).

I also like to vary this with "can you hold please whilst I transfer you" and place the telephone next to the nearest radio (haven't timed this one yet).

lol, 27 minutes. That's something to be proud of!

There you go people, you have a record to beat.

 

[Jimmie_Ohio]

You need a 914 Hz tone (LINK)



-Eric

I forgot about the Telezapper!

My question was because I remembered that I needed to add a # key in my fax/modem setup so it would accept faxes (this was 15-20 years ago...)

 

[TConnolly]

You can always try what this guy did:

Recording here: http://www.boreme.com/boreme/funny-2006/telemarketer-prank-p1.php

When the telemarketer called he masqueraded as a detective investigating a murder, told him he could not hang up because he was being questioned about the case, and grilled the telemarketer about his relationship with the so called deceased, he told him the call had been traced, and that the police in his home town wouuld be contacted to bring him in for questioning.

 

[Sheldn]

i've heard that in US there is some "no call list". did you try it?

Wouldn't it be easier to have a "DO CALL" list.

 

[dmroeder]

I constantly get calls from DirecTV asking me to return to them. I had them for a year, but they ****ed me off, so I cancelled it. Now when they call, I just politely tell them that I don't need their service because I already get it for free. When they ask how, I tell them that I steal it. They called back about 2 more times and I told them the same thing... they haven't called back in a couple of months.

I actually don't have TV at all, but it's funny to hear the reaction.

 

[Jimmie_Ohio]

i've heard that in US there is some "no call list". did you try it?

Here's the problem with the "no call list" from my experience and what I understand is true about its rules:

1) The company must be someone you never did business with before. (PROBLEM: You buy something. They can legitimately call you about extended warranties, accessories, etc.)

2) Around Election Day, you get calls from politicians and groups with a cause to support an issue. (PROBLEM: This is not covered by the no call list.

3) If you do put someone on the list and they call, you must do all the documentation to prosecute. (PROBLEM: Is it really worth my beer-drinking time to keep even more spreadsheets?)

4) I also believe charities are immune to this list.

 

[allscott]

You can always try what this guy did:

Recording here: http://www.boreme.com/boreme/funny-2006/telemarketer-prank-p1.php

When the telemarketer called he masqueraded as a detective investigating a murder, told him he could not hang up because he was being questioned about the case, and grilled the telemarketer about his relationship with the so called deceased, he told him the call had been traced, and that the police in his home town wouuld be contacted to bring him in for questioning.

That one was funny.

Here's another one that's a bit disturbing.

http://www.break.com/index/new-level-of-crazy.html

When someone calls and asks me to buy something I act interested and then tell them that one of my kids is selling chocolates to raise money to go to summer camp and ask them if they would like to help out....

 

[Hoftronics]

All these telemarketing calls, go directly to my 11 year old kid, he loves them, keeps them buisy for 1/2 houer till they start to realize they get no were with him.

Its a double wamy, wastes the telemarketer time, and keeps my kid buizy, and he allready knows not to give out any personal information, he just invents them as the telemarketer asks him.

 

[The Plc Kid]

All these telemarketing calls, go directly to my 11 year old kid, he loves them, keeps them buisy for 1/2 houer till they start to realize they get no were with him.

Its a double wamy, wastes the telemarketer time, and keeps my kid buizy, and he allready knows not to give out any personal information, he just invents them as the telemarketer asks him.

Priceless.

 

[Peter Nachtwey]

Can you redirect them?

ohhhh ........ that's just evil!!

to one of those expensive ripoff 800 or 888 numbers?