Rick, you state that the first motor is started and the current is 41amps. Is the motor able to get up to running speed before the second motor is energized? I would expect that the first motor's current would drop down to something less than 41amps when it gets up to running speed. Or maybe the load is so heavy that the first motor would stay in overload until the second motor begins to help out. Please explain the timing on this for me.
Now for some general comments. First, running two induction motors mechanically coupled together to share load is not a good idea under the best of circumstances. Induction motors simply don't share load very well when forced to run at common speeds.
Second, as long as both motors have the same number of poles (or base speed---1200, 1800, 3600, etc) they will not "fight" each other. An electric motor without any shaft load will run within one rpm of its sync speed--1200, 1800, 3600, regardless of what its nameplate rpm is. As you add load to the shaft, the motor will slow down slightly until, at nameplate hp and rated torque output, the speed will have dropped to nameplate speed. Depending on how the motor is built, one motor may have a full load speed of 1710 while another may have 1750. The important thing here is that this speed defines the motor torque output and is not enforced any other way. If you couple a 1710 rpm motor with a 1750rpm motor, the 1750rpm motor will reach its rated torque output at 1750rpm while the 1710rpm motor is producing somewhere less than half of its output. Clearly, this is not very good load sharing. Further complicating this, you can't believe the nameplate data when precision is required. There are some variations between motors as they are produced and the nameplates are made for the approximate average of all of the production. Good enough for most applications but not good enough for load sharing.
Third, single phase motors behave way out-of-character during their starting process. Asking them to load share during this starting phase is a real reach of faith. If the machine could be brought up to speed by the first motor and then the second motor added online before the load was applied to the machine, the odds of success would be improved. Even better would be decoupling the second motor from the machine until the second motor was fully accelerated and then coupling it back online.
Fourth, I'm not nearly as familiar with single phase as with three phase but, I believe there are different types of single phase starting. Isn't there part winding, capacitor, and maybe some others? I doubt that mixing these would be conducive to good load sharing during the startup process. Maybe Rick's motors are of different starting technologies.
Fifth, someone above mentioned inverters on single phase motors. Sorry, but that doesn't work, period. There are single phase input, three phase output inverters but the motor would always be three phase if downstream from an inverter. (There are minor obscure exceptions to this but nothing that would be useful in Rick's case)
Rick, would you also tell us what the machine is that the motors are driving and whether the machine can be brought up to speed without loading first.
Thanks.